FACEBOOK WILL (not) END ON MARCH 15th!

[Psychoticninja]

Not sure if its true or not, but according to this article FACEBOOK WILL END ON MARCH 15th!!

http://weeklyworldnews.com/headlines/27321/facebook-will-end-on-march-15th/

PALO ALTO, CA –Mark Zuckerberg announced that Facebook will be shut down in March. Managing the site has become too stressful.

“Facebook has gotten out of control,” said Zuckerberg in a press conference outside his Palo Alto office, “and the stress of managing this company has ruined my life. I need to put an end to all the madness.”

Zuckerberg went on to explain that starting March 15th, users will no longer be able to access their Facebook accounts.

“After March 15th the whole website shuts down,” said Avrat Humarthi, Vice President of Technical Affairs at Facebook. “So if you ever want to see your pictures again, I recommend you take them off the internet. You won’t be able to get them back once Facebook goes out of business.”

Zuckerberg said that the decision to shut down Facebook was difficult, but that he does not think people will be upset.

“I personally don’t think it’s a big deal,” he said in a private phone interview. “And to be honest, I think it’s for the better. Without Facebook, people will have to go outside and make real friends. That’s always a good thing.”

Some Facebook users were furious upon hearing the shocking news.

“What am I going to do without Facebook?” said Denise Bradshaw, a high school student from Indiana. “My life revolves around it. I’m on Facebook at least 10 hours a day. Now what am I going to do with all that free time?”

However, parents across the country have been experiencing a long anticipated sense of relief.

“I’m glad the Facebook nightmare is over,” said Jon Guttari, a single parent from Detroit. “Now my teenager’s face won’t be glued to a computer screen all day. Maybe I can even have a conversation with her.”

Those in the financial circuit are criticizing Zuckerberg for walking away from a multibillion dollar franchise. Facebook is currently ranked as one of the wealthiest businesses in the world, with economists estimating its value at around 7.9 billion.

But Zuckerberg remains unruffled by these accusations. He says he will stand by his decision to give Facebook the axe.

“I don’t care about the money,” said Zuckerberg. “I just want my old life back.”

The Facebook Corporation suggests that users remove all of their personal information from the website before March 15th. After that date, all photos, notes, links, and videos will be permanently erased.

What are your thoughts? :shy:

[On a Pale Horse]

I assume you're joking, but you did put this in The Gazette?

[Fran Fine]

Oh my goodness I can't believe this is happening. Well, if this does happen at least we still have myspace.

[Kat]

Why the fuck would have Goldman Sachs have invested 450 Million into it then?

http://www.slate.com/id/2280261/

Plus, they have talked about having an IPO and going on the stock market.

I call 100% bull-fucking-shit on this one.
ADDED:
Also, this is weekly world news we are talking about. You wouldn't believe the shit that those clowns put out.

[Michellemabelle]

It's from Weekly World fucking News. No doubt it's total bullshit.

[God of Thunder]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Ya beat me to it. Weekly World News is specifically total bullshit. Batboy, 300 pound baby, alien kids, photoshopped 'news pictures', etc. etc.

I highly, highly doubt Facebook will be shut down, intentionally.

[On a Pale Horse]

I thought he was being sarcastic to begin with but he did put it in the Gazette so I guess he doesnt know what The Weekly World News is.

[Psychoticninja]

I actually put it in the Gazette for someone to verify or not. And Pale is right, I really don't know about the Weekly World News.

Batboy, 300 pound baby, alien kids, photoshopped 'news pictures', etc. etc. With those stories then.... its got to be true!

[On a Pale Horse]

Its a Supermarket tabloid notorious for stories about Bat Boy, Elvis, and Aliens. In other words its a notch above Infowars :)

[God of Thunder]

Yeah plus, by now... I highly doubt Zuckerberg even cares about 'his old life' or would be so 'noble' as to do something like this. It's a huge organization that makes an absurd amount of dough, with the way this guy's probably been living since it took off, he'd have to be an idiot to close it off. What's he gonna do, apply for a job at Burger King instead?

As for WWN, a quick search on Google Image should tell you all you need to know about them. ;)

[SlasherFreak]

Its a Supermarket tabloid notorious for stories about Bat Boy, Elvis, and Aliens. In other words its a notch above Infowars :)

hahahaha

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3057/2367515373_515ff7a325.jpg

[On a Pale Horse]

I think FB is going to evolve into something much more. Its going to be all inclusive- email, web search, maybe even their own TV channel. It just keeps growing.
ADDED:
hahahaha

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3057/2367515373_515ff7a325.jpg

Man too bad you're not in Philly. I'm about to head out for a beer, I'd invite you.

[SlasherFreak]

Man too bad you're not in Philly. I'm about to head out for a beer, I'd invite you.

Yeah, and when they win the big one, Ill miss the parade too :(

[Rick]

Poor batboy gets no respect.
That guy has had a tough life.

[WesReviews]

Facebook himself just posted this...

"We didn't get the memo about shutting down, so we'll keep working away like always. We aren't going anywhere; we're just getting started."

So... yeah.

[nottidelterrore]

I called "bullshit" when I read the subject. The site isn't going anywhere.

[On a Pale Horse]

Whats even funnier is every few months or so the 'FACEBOOK IS GOING TO START CHARGING! SIGN THIS PETITION!" thing goes around. Thats been going around for years, and even occurred back on MySapce when that was popular. Dumb.

[Uncle Hoody]

Hotmail, AOL, Yahoo, and ICQ were all supposed to start charging if you didn't pass on some sort of forwarding item lol


Still waiting on Ronald McDonald to dance on my screen

[Sutter Cane]

So...the world isn't going to end? I bought all these canned goods and toilet paper for nothing?

[The Dark Vampire]

For the Facebook will charge it wouldn't surprise me if they make it that you can choose to pay to get rid of the advertising or you don't have to pay and keep it like it is now I'm sure some sites do that now

[Uncle Hoody]

http://www.life-by-design-blog.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/homer-says-the-end-is-near.jpg

[sickboy]

http://www.unethicalcoffee.com/nighsmall.jpg

[On a Pale Horse]

The funny thing about all the bogus 'gonna start charging!" rumors is that FB makes over a billion a year as is. The classic saying 'if it aint broke dont fix it' applies perfectly here.

Popular sites make money off advertising revenue -> advertising revenue is high for sites with high traffic -> sites get high traffic because they are free -> return to beginning

[Jus-X]

This is most disappointing. I just sold ALL of my stocks in Facebook thinking it was going to be shut down, only to find out this shit was a hoax? Pschoticninja, you are a horrible horrible person, and I wish for you to perish.

http://www.thesixthnonsense.com/uploads/just-kidding-no-candy.jpg

[Fran Fine]

Thank goodness. I was almost worried for a second there. Who in the right mind would write and post something like this that isn't even true is beyond me.

[Struckworld]

Who would give up a $50 Billion company!?!?

Thats something those writers should of thought of before they start writing bullshit.

[On a Pale Horse]

FB is a hot topic so it makes for a catchy headline.

Shouldnt this thread be in Party Cabin at this point?

[Psychoticninja]

If it has to be moved, then away from the Gazette it shall go!

[skuppy]

Guys, The World Weekly News is like the Onion. I guess some of you may be too young to remember seeing the WWN in supermarkets, bookstores, etc... All their stories were total fiction. At one time, I believe in the mid 90s, they had a TV show. It only lasted a season. I think there are still WWN stories in one of the current tabloids, not sure which one though. I used to buy the newspaper on occasion as it was quite interesting.

[The Dream Master]

Fuck you man, Batboy is real.

[Voorheeszilla]

Pretty obvious, considering they're not just going to shut down a company worth billions of dollars that millions upon millions of people use to a large extent on a daily basis. And I still conclude that anyone who believed this for a second is a complete moron.

[Rick]

Fuck you man, Batboy is real.

You know that and I know that, but the others won't listen.

[Kat]

and Elvis is working at a gas station in Roswell owned by aliens.

[Jus-X]

Fuck you man, Batboy is real.
Heck yes dude!

First article done on him:
http://laist.com/attachments/la_tomdog/batboy.jpg

second:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_9gn6KLa5xtY/RrimkRTnubI/AAAAAAAAAss/YeUVMfwZ_gA/s400/BatBoy3.jpg

Fourth (can't find the third)"

http://gregbardsley.files.wordpress.com/2007/08/batboy_steals_mini.jpg

Most recent:

http://www.pouncenow.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/batboy.jpg

and Elvis is working at a gas station in Roswell owned by aliens.

No Nanners, Roswell is owned by the original inhabitants of the rock we call Earth, us humans are the aliens.

;)

[Kat]

I wonder if Batboy ever parties with Elvis? Hey, does Batboy have a facebook page?
ADDED:
Weekly World News - Before photoshop was cool.

[skuppy]

Speaking of Bat Boy, any of you remember the musical done on him? I never did get to go to it, but recall reading about it in the newspaper.