My work...

[Jus-X]

Man, I just found my old songbook with a bunch of shit I put together from 2003 to 2007. Some of it was recorded with my old band, A Fervent Cry, but that recording is lost somewhere.

Anyways, I'm reading through this and all of these memories are coming back from writing these. All of these are written by something significant that happened either in my life or in the lives of some of my loved ones.

I'd like to share the lyrics (since I don't have the equipment to record this) and post it. Feel free to leave comments on these and critique them.

Why?

If falling apart is a song then I'm the writer of it's words
And I'm composing a symphony

As my mind is wasting away I'm feeling stronger than before
It doesn't make any sense to me

Why does it always seem to hurt just to know a little more?
Why does it take a broken heart to keep you from falling to the floor?
Why does it always seem to hurt just to keep a little strong?
Why does the pain not seem to go away?

Surrounded by dark without a light, searching for answers seeming far away
Or maybe they're right here infront of me?
The questions getting too hard to face, unable to confront the shit getting in the way
The sorrow keeps on infecting me.

Why does it always seem to hurt just to know a little more?
Why does it take a broken heart to keep you from falling to the floor?
Why does it always seem to hurt just to keep a little strong?
Why does the pain not seem to go away?

I wrote this after my family almost fell apart to alcoholism. It has a "Staind" sound to it.

[Jus-X]

A Thousand Words

A thousand words, a million thoughts
Trying to rape my mind to shreds
This inward battle I have fought
It turns away its somber head

I thought that I would be in pain
And angered by your hurtful words
Instead I find myself unchaging
In the midst of the absurd

And I won't let you take me down this time
I'll push above the surface of your self-righteous cries
I won't let you tear me up inside
I'll let your lust-stained heart lead to your demise

A lover's dream has come and gone
And blows away in the debris
It didn't really take so long
To change my storms to calming seas

My soul no longer anchored down
I'm free to move I'm pressing on
What was lost I now have found
Into new life I'm being drawn

And I won't let you take me down this time
I'll push above the surface of your self-righteous cries
I won't let you tear me up inside
I'll let your lust-stained heart lead to your demise

So far away, so far away
I'm pushing you so far away
So far away, so far away from me
Away from me!!!

A thousand dreams and just one song
Another chance to live my life
Away from your abusive words
Away from your abusive words


Wrote this after a friend of mine got cheated on by his girlfriend. He was all into a future with her and it all feel apart, which is why the second verse mentions the "lover's dream" that blew away in the debris, but he wanted to get back onto his feet and didn't want this to weigh him down.