J Money (My Music)

[Voorheeszilla]

Hey everyone, I figured it'd be okay to make a thread pertaining to my music, but before I post anything I just want to say a few things.

First, I'd like to say, without coming off as arrogant, that all of the feedback I've received on my music has been positive thus far, & everyone's been really honest about it. I'd like that to continue here. Don't like the music? Tell me why. And vice versa if you do like it.

Secondly, I'm not sure how many of you are rap fans. I've sent messages to the member's whom I know are fans, but whether you are or not, just listen to the songs. A quick listen won't hurt. ;)

Well, here they are:

J Money - Rough

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9g7ria74DA

J Money & Da Boss TJ - Here We Go

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9q8ixgbM2yI

J Money & Da Boss TJ Ft. 2Pac - Gansta

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2tLEZH6m3HQ

J Money - Harder Than Ever

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gG_oK7HLALA

And just in case you don't notice right off the bat, for the song "Here We Go" we sampled the Joker from TDK, hence the title of the song. I am absolutely in love with TDK, & I told my friend we should sample Heath's Joker, he agreed, came over one morning, & put the beat together in half an hour, & it's hella good, in my opinion.

Also, once again, don't be shy to tell me what you really think. I don't care if you absolutely hate the music, I want to hear ALL types of criticism, because it'll only help me do better for later songs. And speaking of later songs, I actually just started rapping seriously this year, & have been writing songs for about the last three months. As it stands, including the five posted, I have at least 25 written, & about a total of 10 or so recorded. So, I plan on pumping out a lot of work, but I want to make sure I'm as good lyrically on each song as possible, because I don't want to put out garbage.

Thanks for reading & I look forward to hearing what you all have to say.

[Jus-X]

I wasn't expecting your voice to be so deep. You're what, 16? 17?

I don't really listen to rap very much but I do understand music and recognize skill versus mimicry, and you do have skill from what I hear. You have emotion in what you sing, your rhyming and words are consistant to the measurement of the beats in the music.

If you can put a little more Soul style into it, such as mixing rap up with singing, that's more my style and it would be easier to say if its good or not. For example, in Living In The Struggle there's other voices in the backround, synthesizer maybe? Sing to that for your chorus. It's hard to hear the key it's in when the beats are louder than the helping tones, but it sounds like it's in Cm? So sing the notes C Db C Bb G in one measure twice, then C Db C C(next octave up) G in one measure. ( if that's the key, can't tell. Transpose accordingly.)

You're not doing anything wrong with your music, it's just hard to say it's good or bad when its not my style. But you have the talent and from what I hear, you know your stuff. Don't change the music, don't change the rap, just add a little singing in and it's easier to make a better opinion.

[Kat]

Although, I don't listen to a lot of rap. I thought it was good, only complaint that I had was in my headphones the beat was louder than the rapping, and it was hard to hear your voice and the singing. Otherwise, I did enjoy it.
ADDED:
Living in the Struggle was good, I could hear the lyrics and everything like that.

[Jus-X]

Living in the Struggle was good, I could hear the lyrics and everything like that.

Did that sound like C minor scale to you?

[Kat]

Did that sound like C minor scale to you?

Possibly. It is hard to tell, my hearing is so messed up on stuff like that.

[DD77]

Yeah the mix was off in places especially, the first few songs. The vocals need to come up and beats turned down. As far as mix and vocal tone quality I think Harder than ever was maybe the best and parts of we gettin it maybe had better vocal tone quality.

Don't know what mics and equipment you're using but some vocals were real rough sounding, and even more so when vocal effects were added. Some filtering, compressing, along with turning the beats down could go towards smoothing out the tracks overall, and make them feel less harsh and digital around the edges if you know what I mean.

[Kat]

Yeah, basically - content and music good, turn up the production value.

[Violent VictiM]

Not too bad. I find when I do my music, I'll record that tracks with the beat low just so I can get everything together and sounding right tune wise, then I'll erase the beat, mix down the verses/chorus separately, re-open a new session, add the beat then put the acapellas in.. fuck around with the EQ and then volume, then mix down.

What program you using? I switch between Garageband and Logic.

[SlasherFreak]

Yeah you should record to a beat, but have a seperate acapella track for the vocals, and then mix them down. Then add effects on the vocals (not too many though, too many effects can really make something cheesy...most definitely have at least a reverb)...and also tweak the frequencies on the vocals and turn it up using COMPRESSION...DONT just use the volume button. When you tweak the frequencies the right way and use compression to turn the vocals up, they won't get distorted and won't drown out the beat...cause I have a feeling with the way you and whoever is engineering this, if you turn the vocals up they'll end up drowning out the beat, and the beats right now are drowning out the vocals, so its like a lose lose. Those vocals need to be alot better quality...if you're serious, I would suggest a high quality microphone with a pre amp and record where there is as little air as possible.

All this summed is simple: You gotta make sure the vocals are on the same frequency pattern as the beat. That way everything blends together perfectly and you don't have to worry about the instrumental drowning out the vocals or vice versa. It's called mastering. Even on some very good amateur recordings, you can find if you crank it up loud enough, something enventually gets drowned out or distorted, either the vocals or the instrumental track...because they weren't mastered properly.

I use Pro Tools, btw.

Ok songs, really not my type of beats though

[Violent VictiM]

Yo dimid, no joke... if you could call me later (grab my number from the call VV thread) and describe what you're talking about to me and try and help me find out where I'd have to go in Garageband to do that I'd fuckin' love you forever, dude. Most recording software is universal it's just in different places, I'm sure I can find whatever you're talking about. That'd make my shit sound a little bit better than what I discovered to do with the acapellas.

[Jus-X]

The way my band used to do home recordings, we set up two mics for drums, mic'd the our amps, boom mic in the middle of the room. Used the recorded as a scratch track and used it for reference to record drums by themselves, bass by itself, guitars by themselves, and created them all on sepereate tracks. Then I sung to the scratch track and created the vocal track. This gave us full EQ access to each instrument. Only software we used was for recording. Never used software to create music. So the whole garageband software stuff is new to me.

Zilla, I recommend real music, not synthesized music. Just my two cents.

[SlasherFreak]

Yo dimid, no joke... if you could call me later (grab my number from the call VV thread) and describe what you're talking about to me and try and help me find out where I'd have to go in Garageband to do that I'd fuckin' love you forever, dude. Most recording software is universal it's just in different places, I'm sure I can find whatever you're talking about. That'd make my shit sound a little bit better than what I discovered to do with the acapellas.

Yeah I can give you a call when i get a chance. I still got your number stored in my phone from when you first made that thread and i pranked you before we started talking...remember that shit? You said hold on let me wipe the shaving cream off my face...and i said are you sure its shaving cream? haha.

but anyways...yeah ill give u a call...and im gonna check your thread out later. The computer im on sucks balls.

[Violent VictiM]

Word. My cell phone got shut off today indefinitely so I'll let you know when that shit is back on and we can get it poppin'.

[girlychaos]

VV and Di...please don't derail the thread, guys. PM one another to discuss other things that aren't about VZ's music.

Thanks. :)

[GameOver]

But don't delete shit either maybe I'll learn something.

[Voorheeszilla]

Thanks everyone, & the program I used is FL Studio 8.

As for production value, there is still some equipment we don't have that we're looking to get soon, so we do what we can for now, but I'll agree on a few of the songs I probably should've just recorded it over & went from there to make it better.

[Violent VictiM]

I got a mic for $100, and a tiny little mixer for about $60. Before that, I used to record on computer mics; it's not necessarily the overall quality that'll get people attention. I mean I used to just straight up put a mic to a set a speakers and just freestyle to make my CDs. They sounded terrible but they were so funny that people loved 'em.

Listen to Dimidio, man. He's smart with this music stuff. A little forceful in his opinions but he means well; and he makes sick beats too. Definitely pay attention to the EQ stuff we were talking about; definitely mix down your shit when it sounds right then save the acapellas. Then put them over back over the beatt and louder them.

I don't know Fruity Loops too well, but it's gotta be in there somewhere. Don't settle for pre-set EQs, as those are really in there for professional equipment that can handle them. For home operations like ours you definitely wanna find the way to manually tweak the EQs. Your songs have a lot of bass, so I'd probably turn the highs down some, fuck with the treble and go into the mids even a little so you can retain some of that bass.

In my opinion, Macs are the best for editing music. Logic is the sickest program I've ever seen in my life, and even if you can't get it, Garageband is pretty much a low end version of it and works just fine. In fact I usually record songs more in Garageband anyway, and leave Logic for fuckin with beats, or for the few effects it has that are better than Garageband.

Also, I know you're black but you don't have to say "nigga". I've survived 13 years thus far in the game without saying it once, it's just a stupid filler word. Sometimes it honestly takes away from a song if it's said too much.

[Voorheeszilla]

I use the word "nigga" to help elaborate my point. Sorry, but I don't plan on stopping it's usage in my music. I try not to say it too much per song, but I'm not going to stop using it 100%. And it's nice to hear all of the suggestions & such. My ears are always open to any type of criticism so I don't want it to seem as if I'm coming off as a dickhead, because I have written a song where I don't cuss at all, & I was able to fully elaborate what point I was trying to drive home. Hopefully I'll be able to get to working on that song very soon.

Also, to answer earlier questions, yes, Justyn, I'm 16 & I'm not really that much of a singer. The most I can really do is put more emotion into it, but outright singing isn't something I'm good at.

One thing I do want to do as far as my songs go is diversify, & switch up my topics. I just finished another song a couple of days ago called "Deeper Than Rap" where I kind of touch on some of the problems I've had. Here it is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpRR7p99ggQ

[Jus-X]

Also, to answer earlier questions, yes, Justyn, I'm 16 & I'm not really that much of a singer. The most I can really do is put more emotion into it, but outright singing isn't something I'm good at. -Zilla

I think you're a talented guy. A good writer, rapper, and a master debator (;))

So I'm not saying it's bad you don't sing, just that rap itself isn't my favor of music. But I've listened to some rap over the weekend and I can easily compare what I heard in here with what I've listened to.

The other are right, take your music down or your vocals up, but you're just as good as what I've heard this weekend.

[Voorheeszilla]

Thanks a billion Justyn, & I've been trying to do that. I feel like "Gansta" is all around the best track we've done, it's just perfect to me with the way it was done, & it almost feels like two different songs. But, yes, I do plan on trying to make the production value as good as I can. Btw, it's cool that rap music isn't really what you listen to, everyone has preferences, but from my perspective, whether you're a rap fan or not, your opinion is just as valuable as a rap fan.

I appreciate the feedback, everyone, & be sure to tell me what you think of the latest song. ;)

[Voorheeszilla]

Here's the newest song:

Beef:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dfTEMHLrV7U

Everybody be sure to listen & as always, give me your opinion/insight on the song.

[Jus-X]

It's good. I don't have the best speakers here, but the EQ sounds better from what I can here. I have some recommendations for your next songs: Spam, Cheese, and Squid.

No, in all seriousness, I have a real recommendation... do a song about a horror movie icon. Jason would be cool becuase maybe you could mix up "ki ki ki ma ma ma" into the song, or even do like a ki, kikiki, ki, kikiki, ki, kima, kiki, kikiki.

Stop laughing at me. :shifty: I'm white!

[kiss_armyman1]

Just checked out a couple of your trax. This stuff really isnt my cup of tea .From what I hear you got your shit together. You got great production,a good voice etc. Keep digging ,and working hard .

[Voorheeszilla]

Thanks, I appreciate that a lot. Like I said, I don't care what genre of music you're into, your opinion is just as valuable as my fellow rap fans are, so it's all good.
ADDED:
It's good. I don't have the best speakers here, but the EQ sounds better from what I can here. I have some recommendations for your next songs: Spam, Cheese, and Squid.

No, in all seriousness, I have a real recommendation... do a song about a horror movie icon. Jason would be cool becuase maybe you could mix up "ki ki ki ma ma ma" into the song, or even do like a ki, kikiki, ki, kikiki, ki, kima, kiki, kikiki.

Stop laughing at me. :shifty: I'm white!

I've referenced Jason at least twice in my songs. One was in "Murda" & another was in this song called "H20" but that's a placeholder name, actually. In the latter, I mention all three of the big names, but as far as doing a song based specifically on one...not really my style, but if I can come up with something, I'll do it, especially if TJ can kick out a beat that I could really get into & do it. That's a good suggestion, Justyn. I think I'm gonna have to take you up on that. :D

[Jus-X]

Yeah I heard the refrences, but I'm talking about a full out song.

[SlasherFreak]

I really hate to be the fuckhead of the bunch, but you are in dire need of a real microphone. These sound like you record these songs on a pair of head phones plugged into the mic jack on a computer or a laptop. Then, it sounds like whoever is mixing it is putting on way too much reverb to somehow make it sound like it came out of a studio, and they fail in a miserable type of way.

Get a microphone, and tell whoever is mixing it to turn down the reverb effect WAAAAYYYYY down. These are practically unlistenable. The beats, although not my kinda shit, sound kinda crisp, but the vocals on these are horrible. On top of the vocals being bad quality, someone is putting on a heavy reverb on a few of these.

[Kat]

On Beef, until 44 seconds in, it sounded like mumbling. I couldn't even make out one word. The rest of it was OK.

I agree with DiMidio, and my personal opinion, it isn't the vocals being bad vocals, it's the quality of them. If it higher production value, it'd be a lot better

[Voorheeszilla]

I'm working on it, but for the time being I have to do the best I can with what I have, & we're trying to do the best we can. TJ is aware of this more than I am, so he does what he can with what we have at the moment. I'll eventually start upgrading, but that's when I get some cash.

[Violent VictiM]

An upgrade in equipment isn't as important as just fucking with the EQs. I feel like it's not being done. Like I said, my first few CDs were recorded on a computer mic and the effects and shit I added made it sound very good.

Also, the sound isn't really original. I felt like I was listening to a Chamillionaire/Chingy track. It was good, don't get me wrong. It just sounds too generic.

[Voorheeszilla]

Yeah, but there are going to be songs that are generic, because sometimes we like to bullshit around & see what we can come up with, which is what he did the night we made that song. When we do deeper songs that have more emotion put into it, & are meant to be serious, the result you get is something like Gansta.
ADDED:
J Money Ft. 2Pac, Biggie Smalls, & Big L - Rough Remix

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUDCHu7_Naw

[SlasherFreak]

ADDED:
J Money Ft. 2Pac, Biggie Smalls, & Big L - Rough Remix

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUDCHu7_Naw

Um....

ok....

welll...damn, ok....

if you EVER want anyone to take you serious

...dont evereverevereverevereverevervever do that again.

[Voorheeszilla]

And what's wrong with that song? I'm being taken serious by a lot of people who have told me they've enjoyed the song. I don't see the problem with it, it's a good song, & it blends together very well. TJ made the decision to blend those verses together, & I agreed with him. I wanted to a remix to that song, & do it in the best way possible, I think we did that. The first one I did was good, but it didn't come out how I wanted it. That version has more emotion in it because I was in the zone. It's not as if I did a song with those three on it to say "hey, everyone, I'm as great as these guys." I did it because I wanted to make the hottest song I could, I think we succeeded. I really don't see the problem with it.

[Violent VictiM]

You put yourself on a track with three of the greatest rappers of all time and you're not even a viral hit yet -- that's what's wrong. Good song, nice lyrics, but you shouldn't just throw yourself on a track like that. Where I come from that'd get you laughed at.

[Voorheeszilla]

I'm not particularly worried about being a hit yet, I'm just worried about making good tracks. I understand your point, I get that, but the track came out good. It's not going to be something that happens all the time, we did it because it felt appropriate for the time. And we're from two different areas...where I'm from if you're good if you're on a track with guys like this, or on an instrumental they were on, if you're good, then they pay attention to that.

[SlasherFreak]

Okie dokie. Good luck

[Violent VictiM]

Track definitely came out good. I just don't think it's appropriate. That's like if I put myself on a track with Eminem. It's bad move in the sense that I'm trying to alienate myself from another white rapper, plus I'm no where near his level so I just personally would never do it.

You might get some props for it, and like I said it's a good track, but I personally wouldn't do it. What you do is what you do, and can't no one do anything about it. If you felt that was a good move, and where you're from is getting you props then do it. Fuck what we say.

Where are you from? Cause I'm from Long Island and Dimidio is reppin Philly/Atlanta. I'm a stones throw from NYC, so we're reppin' pretty hardcore rap areas and we're sayin' in a general consensus that shit would get you laughed at here.

[Voorheeszilla]

Thanks, I guess. All I'm saying is if we make a good track, what's the problem? It'd be different if I was trying to milk off these guys to see some sort of success, which people try to do all the time, but that's not what's happening here.
ADDED:
Track definitely came out good. I just don't think it's appropriate. That's like if I put myself on a track with Eminem. It's bad move in the sense that I'm trying to alienate myself from another white rapper, plus I'm no where near his level so I just personally would never do it.

You might get some props for it, and like I said it's a good track, but I personally wouldn't do it. What you do is what you do, and can't no one do anything about it. If you felt that was a good move, and where you're from is getting you props then do it. Fuck what we say.

Where are you from? Cause I'm from Long Island and Dimidio is reppin Philly/Atlanta. I'm a stones throw from NYC, so we're reppin' pretty hardcore rap areas and we're sayin' in a general consensus that shit would get you laughed at here.

I get that point, Eminem is on a different plateau, so I can understand that sentiment, & I'm from Detroit, I actually said it in the songs, bro. We put 2Pac on "Gansta" & everybody loved it, I haven't really gotten any bad feedback. Like I said, though, I don't want anyone to think me & TJ are trying to build our own foundation off of them, so we're not going to do that all the time.

Also, at the same time, I'll admit I was anxious to get 'Pac on a track of mine. That's who I got my style from...to be direct with it, not a lot of punchlines, just straightforward.

[Violent VictiM]

Ah, I missed the Detroit shout out. I kinda just had it on working on some screenplays and shit.

[Voorheeszilla]

Fair enough, I try to throw out as many shout outs to Detroit as I can.

Now, I have to ask, from a lyrical standpoint, where am I at?

[Violent VictiM]

You're much better than a lot of the kids that try to go at this. If you're trying to make this a career? Need a lot of work. As a hobby? it's nice. I mean, I don't know how old you are or anything but as you get older you'll definitely progress. I'd like to see what you can do with some concepts. Instead of just spittin' "oh I'm nice, oh I'm ill" maybe a few story telling shits, somethin' where you aren't even rapping about yourself.

Your flow could use a little work, you definitely get off beat a lot. But that shit can be easily fixed with taking out or adding a word or two. Your delivery needs to be stepped up a lot. You don't sound like you mean what you're saying, just reading it. Put a little more umph in your voice and it'd be ill. I definitely think you got a Chamillionaire vibe to you, which definitely isn't bad.

[SlasherFreak]

I won't lie, i skimmed through the replies, but i will say again, someone fucked up Big L's vocals something horrible. They're not on the beat at all.

And you don't put acapellas of established rappers on your song....at all....and expect people to take it seriously.

DiMidio & 40 Holmes f. Big L, 2Pac, Biggie, Big Pun...imagine that shit
ADDED:
its like back in the day when you searched on napster or.....the latger generation, kazaaa. If you typed in Big L and seen Big L f. Major MC Dynomite...you knew not to download that shit

[Voorheeszilla]

You're much better than a lot of the kids that try to go at this. If you're trying to make this a career? Need a lot of work. As a hobby? it's nice. I mean, I don't know how old you are or anything but as you get older you'll definitely progress. I'd like to see what you can do with some concepts. Instead of just spittin' "oh I'm nice, oh I'm ill" maybe a few story telling shits, somethin' where you aren't even rapping about yourself.

I'm 16 at the moment, & I'm trying to go for some story telling songs, I know what I want to talk about, but I either need to find an instrumental to go along with it, or have TJ make one from scratch. The closest I got to story telling was "Deeper Than Rap" but I was talking about myself.

Your flow could use a little work, you definitely get off beat a lot. But that shit can be easily fixed with taking out or adding a word or two. Your delivery needs to be stepped up a lot. You don't sound like you mean what you're saying, just reading it. Put a little more umph in your voice and it'd be ill. I definitely think you got a Chamillionaire vibe to you, which definitely isn't bad.

I can't argue with that because sometimes I can be off beat, but normally, I write my lyrics to the beat. I sit down, listen to the beat, figure out what's my topic, & write. Some songs don't sound like I'm serious, some do, that's a problem I'm correcting. And thanks, I take that as a compliment, I'm a big Chamillionaire fan.

[Violent VictiM]

Yeah, dude. I've been rapping for almost 13 years and I still get off beat all the time. It's the main reason I either scrap a song or do 100 takes. Sometimes, I literally sit down with a metronome (digital on my phone, that'd be phat if I had one of them old time shits) and just make sure that it's on beat. I usually like to emphasize either the word on the 1 and 3rd beat or the word on the 2nd and forth. I'll do that every few bars or so just to show I'm still on track.

I usually pick beats to write to as opposed to writing then finding one. I feel like I never get the perfect beat in my head, even if I sit down in front of logic and try to key it out myself.

[Voorheeszilla]

Yeah, dude. I've been rapping for almost 13 years and I still get off beat all the time. It's the main reason I either scrap a song or do 100 takes. Sometimes, I literally sit down with a metronome (digital on my phone, that'd be phat if I had one of them old time shits) and just make sure that it's on beat. I usually like to emphasize either the word on the 1 and 3rd beat or the word on the 2nd and forth. I'll do that every few bars or so just to show I'm still on track.

I usually pick beats to write to as opposed to writing then finding one. I feel like I never get the perfect beat in my head, even if I sit down in front of logic and try to key it out myself.

Hey dude, I understand that completely. That's why I listen to 'Pac so much, there's rarely a time he was ever off beat, & that's what I'm trying to get into. I usually do the same as you. I'll listen to beats, find one that really grabs me, & write to it. I find it to be harder to just sit down & write without a beat, & I only do that if the beat I want is playing over & over in my head.

Btw, have you listened to "Murda" & "Harder Than Ever"? I think my energy towards music needs to be more like those songs. There's energy in the remix of "Rough" & in "Gansta" but I feel like the first two I mentioned have the most energy out of any of the songs I've done so far, but lyrically, I think "Gansta" is probably my best song. Now I'm at a point where I feel like I've kind of begin to hit my stride, so I'm expecting to incorporate more energy & enthusiam into my songs.

[Voorheeszilla]

J Money & Da Boss TJ - Hello Good Morning

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GndHJ4vIcIc

I fucking love the way this track came out.

[Kat]

J Money & Da Boss TJ - Hello Good Morning

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GndHJ4vIcIc

I fucking love the way this track came out.

Not a big follower of rap, so I am not up on gossip or news, why do you hate Diddy?

[Jus-X]

J Money & Da Boss TJ - Hello Good Morning

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GndHJ4vIcIc

I fucking love the way this track came out.
I'm not getting the full effect on my computer speakers at work, but this does sound better EQ'd than the others... according to my speakers.

Not a big follower of rap, so I am not up on gossip or news, why do you hate Diddy?

Apparently, according to the YT caption, he talks shit.

He also destroyed a classic Jimmy Page song...

[Voorheeszilla]

Thanks, & I don't like Diddy because...well, 50 Cent put it best...he's like a leech. He focuses on the hottest artist out, & works with them until they aren't the new kid on the block anymore, & he moves on to someone else. Plus, he genuinely comes off as being as fake as they come.

[Kat]

Diddy does come across as a lot faker than most rappers.

Rapping is OK, but quality of the recording isn't great.
Talent is there, just not the production.

[Voorheeszilla]

After going back & listening to my songs, I'd say that is probably our best song....after Gansta. The production will be there more once we start grabbing more equipment.
ADDED:
We completed another song yesterday, we sampled the very beautiful & talented Rose Royce, I hope you all have heard of her. :p

Love Don't Live Here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yw8A21yZdNo

[Violent VictiM]

First and third verse are absolutely terrible. Your verse was the better, but definitely still got some flow issues. Rhymes are kinda tired, also the verses IMO and yu'll probably disagree, have nothing to do with the vibe the chorus gives. You guys hype the chorus really well and then start talking about money with again IMO no segway into letting us know that "love don't live here anymore" so I guess we better worry about money.. ya feel me?

[Voorheeszilla]

How are the verses terrible? And we decided to switch up what we were talking about, I wrote a lot of different verses to that, none of them fit the way those did. Those weren't tired, they were exactly what was on my mind, & reflected how I felt at the moment, especially my second verse.

[Violent VictiM]

I figured it was just the three of you on the track. I don't know, man. I'm just giving you my opinion. To me the first and third just sound like garbled mess. You seem to go with safe rhymes; you're not saying anything that'll blow minds.

"gimme the light, pass the torch n then i feast into it?".. I mean I literally rewinded 4 times and still don't know what the guy is saying, never the less what he's trying to say.

Your verse is the tightest but you just fall back on easy rhymes. Youre first four bars are just bad. The whole thing being about money when saying "love dont live here anymore" throws me off. I mean, the hook definitely expresses the need to get money over love.. but I don't know. It's just weak. Come harder.

Your last few bars weren't very good either. And I feel like it's just the quality. There's a ton of lame rappers out there but their shit just sound so good that it passes. You aren't a lame rapper, you just need work.

I see you guys blowin' blunts in those pictures, why don't you not smoke for like 2 weeks, save the 10 bucks a day youre wasting (I smoke too but I mean, I got ill equipment), and in two weeks of not smoking you can pick up a $100 studio mic and a $35 USB mixer and you'll be on your way to professional quality.

You should leave me a verse open -- we'll do a collab.

Like I said, you aren't BAD.. you just haven't grown into your own yet. I didn't start getting really nice til about 18/19. And I've been doing this since I was 12; I'm almost 25 now nah'mean?

[Voorheeszilla]

I figured it was just the three of you on the track. I don't know, man. I'm just giving you my opinion. To me the first and third just sound like garbled mess. You seem to go with safe rhymes; you're not saying anything that'll blow minds.

There aren't three of us on the three, there never is. It's just me & TJ. And my purpose is not to blow minds right now, I'm just getting started. Where most people fail is that they start off trying to be as lyrical as possible & they try TOO hard to be mind blowing, I'm laid back & doing the songs that I feel I should do. The deeper songs will come later.

"gimme the light, pass the torch n then i feast into it?".. I mean I literally rewinded 4 times and still don't know what the guy is saying, never the less what he's trying to say.

I honestly thought that line would come out bad, but after I listened to it, I thought it came out clearer than we both expected.

Your verse is the tightest but you just fall back on easy rhymes. Youre first four bars are just bad. The whole thing being about money when saying "love dont live here anymore" throws me off. I mean, the hook definitely expresses the need to get money over love.. but I don't know. It's just weak. Come harder.

How exactly is it weak? Me & TJ talked it over before we wrote our songs, we decided that we shouldn't try to go hard on the song, but be more laid back. I'll come harder on the songs that really, really call for it. Like "Gansta" or "Hello Good Morning" but some songs I like to be laid back & do a simple song that is still able to grasp the listener.

Your last few bars weren't very good either. And I feel like it's just the quality. There's a ton of lame rappers out there but their shit just sound so good that it passes. You aren't a lame rapper, you just need work.

It's all subject to opinion, but as I said I feel like it's one of the best songs we've done quality wise, & I still feel that way after listening to it. Every beginning rapper needs work, though. I've only been rapping for a little over a month. Honestly, I think some people are expecting a little too much from me after only a month.

I see you guys blowin' blunts in those pictures, why don't you not smoke for like 2 weeks, save the 10 bucks a day youre wasting (I smoke too but I mean, I got ill equipment), and in two weeks of not smoking you can pick up a $100 studio mic and a $35 USB mixer and you'll be on your way to professional quality.

We're working on getting equipment, but the smoking isn't subject to go. If anything, I'll cut down on it & start getting equipment, but smoking weed is what puts me at the forefront. I've noticed that I'm in a better mindstate when I smoke. My mind is less cluttered, I'm at ease, & I just get in the zone to give my all on a song. Obviously not all of my songs have been done while I'm high, but the best of them have been done while we were high. I understand what you mean, though, & I'm planning on getting more equipment. There's a lot I need, but hopefully by the end of this year we'll have a good majority of what we need.

My cousin, who is into music as well, is planning on setting up a studio for us all to record, so I'm actually looking forward to that. There's a lot that he'll be able to show me & teach me, & plus, he understands my point of view on a lot of things, so it won't be any friction in working with him. Until then, I'm basically warming up. All I can say about the songs I've done is that most of them have been warming up. These songs are like preludes to something bigger. I have a very intricate mind, & I like to think I perceive things a bit differently than the next person, so that'll be into my music. I wouldn't say I'm necessarily trying to do mainstream music to get noticed, because in actuality, the songs I do speak to my emotions toward certain people & subjects & shit like that.

You should leave me a verse open -- we'll do a collab.

I've got no problem with that, bro, I love doing collaborations, gives me a chance to see how other's work on a song, & between me & TJ, we're able to give each other energy. We're always checking with each other on lines & songs, & we give our input so that we're working together completely.

Like I said, you aren't BAD.. you just haven't grown into your own yet. I didn't start getting really nice til about 18/19. And I've been doing this since I was 12; I'm almost 25 now nah'mean?

I know I haven't grown into my own yet, but I'm getting there. I understand your points, & I do agree with some of them, so don't get me wrong, but, like you said, it takes time. I'm getting to the point where the more music I hear, & the more new beats I hear, the hungrier I get, & the more I'm willing to push it further. There are a lot of aspects of rap that I haven't mastered yet that I'm looking to. The main things I've been focused on are lyrics & delivery. Both are getting better, so the more experience I get & the more tracks I do, then the closer I get to where I want to be.

But, until then, like I said, these songs are preludes to some better & bigger material.
ADDED:
No, you know what, Violent? Fuck what I said earlier. You're actually right, I should dig deeper with my songs, & that's what I'm going to do, no matter what the subject is. Now, I'm not dismissing my previous works, but aside from a few songs, those were definitely preludes. Some of the songs were done for fun, some were done when I was thinking so much & had so much drama going on that I felt I had to get those thoughts out, but from now on, I'm going to take you up on your offer.

Why the change of heart? I was thinking about what you said tonight, & I'm writing my own version of "Unthinkable" but I'm not writing it because of how universally loved the song is. I'm a big fan of Alicia Keyes, & just playing the song in my head inspired me so much, so I feel it's an opportunity for me to talk about my own struggles within my own relationship, & at the same time reach out to the person I'm talking to. I feel like I'm really writing some better shit already, & really, I feel good. My first verse is practically done, & I thought I'd do it without cussing or using "nigga" in it. I think that it could be a great mark for how good of an artist I could be if I could write an entire song that is intelligently written. And that's not to say a song can't be intelligently written when you're cussing, but when you're touching on a subject like this where your perrogative is to be as introspective & intricate about the subject as possible, I feel like I should do something different, & it's not a difficult task to do that if you have something that's really important to say.

I agree with Drake that you get a euphoric feeling once you write down certain verses & you know that they are just so good. That's how I'm feeling so far with this song, so I'm hoping that when it's recorded it translates as well as I want it to.

I'm also writing to DMX's "I Can Feel It" in which I wrote two very strong verses. The third verse is very, very weak compared to the first two, so I'm going to tweak it to not only match the first two, but capture the same feeling that I got out of the first two. I'm my own biggest critique, so I'm constantly tweaking songs, & that was the case with "Love Don't Live Here" which was what I was trying to explain before. The first couple of times I wrote verses, I wasn't feeling the beat like I wanted to, but the day we recorded, we both sat down, listened to the beat, dropped the chorus, wrote our verses, & we were both proud of what we wrote, & how we delivered it. I think that as far as that song goes, I finally was able to release the perfect amount of emotion in both verses, so I think I'm past the point where I need to be more emotionally involved.

I'm also writing a song on this new beat TJ made called "Ghost" (title will probably change) where I'm basically talking about what's going on in my mind. Some lines, which I hope everyone catches, are tributes & shout outs to the fallen people I know. It's specifically targeted at TJ's stepdad, who was killed last week, & I didn't know him well, but it's tragic because of the circumstances. They had a rocky relationship, & even though he was no longer with his mom, they were trying to rebuild & start over, & in an instant, his life was cut short.

It's been so much going on lately that it's made me....different, in a way, I don't feel the same. I feel like I want to cherish life more, & I want to try to make the biggest impact on the music business. For me, it's not even about how much money I can get. Yes, I want to make enough money to live well, but right now it's about more than that. I've been on this Earth for 16 years, & living in Detroit, I've seen a lot, so some of my songs are...reports of either what I've seen, experienced, or just the tragedies that surround everyday life. I kind of get offended when people say they doubt if I'm really about what I'm rapping. I'm not going to lie, I haven't had as hard of a life as other's that walk this Earth, it'd be selfish to even utter that statement, but I have struggled, & I'm still struggling, & so is many other people. It's time for me to use my talent to relay all of this to the world, & get them to feel what I feel. TJ can really be said to be responsible for starting me down the path of rap, & he brought it out of me by constantly pushing me to do the best I could when writing, & now, I want to do the same for him. He's experienced a lot more than I have, & some crazy things you wouldn't believe, so we both have stories to tell. We've gone through thick & thin for the last six to seven years, & now I feel like it's time for us to start telling everyone what's been going on in our lives

So, really, there's a lot of things behind my new perspective. Violent's been giving me good feedback & opinions, so I appreciate that a hell of a lot, a lot of things have been going on behind the scenes, & I've been trying to keep myself inspired throughout all the madness. It's hard to do that when you're surrounded in drama, but I know I have support from a lot of people, & I have a lot of people that believe I have a golden opportunity to actually do something important with music, so that's what I plan to do.

Tonight I'm going to write some more songs. I'm about to get back to writing my version of "Unthinkable" which I stopped just to post this, because I had all of this rushing through my mind, but I'll also work on some more songs tonight, because of how much is on my chest that I want to get off. All in all, I'll just end this by saying that I don't think I'm even close to reaching the potential I could have, but, I just want to be consistent with my work, & so far, imo, I think I've done that, but not to the greatest extent.

[Voorheeszilla]

Edit: Song Removed

[Kat]

Unthinkable (I'm Ready):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qj8lpHDHxwU

I know what some people are going to say, that it sounds like I was trying to rap too fast, but I wasn't. It only sounds that way because of my double up, but I am actually on beat, if you listen closely. Also, I'd like to say our goal was to be laid back on this song, considering our topic. Doesn't make sense to get hype for a song like this, when you're trying to express a point.

I tried to watch it/listen to it and it said that the video was removed.

[Voorheeszilla]

Sorry, I meant to edit the post because I removed the video. My verse was fucked up. The first verse always came out good, but when I did my double up, it just ruined it. But, I worked around it, & now it's back on Youtube again.

Here's my other new song as well:

Cold Wind Blows

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5DxMSo2GjWE

This is probably one of my most lyrical & heartfelt songs yet. And before anyone says it, yes, I know I sound like Chamillionaire. :D Haha but anyway, I put a lot of effort into this song, & I worked on it all by myself. I'm glad I did, & TJ let me so I could learn even more about the producer side of things.

[Voorheeszilla]

Here's the latest song:

Ice Cream Paint Job

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UwA0THiE2tQ

And as a message to everyone here, please don't hesitate to check out the music. Like I said, I don't care if you're a rap fan or not, the more ears that open up & listen to my music, the better. I want everyone to listen to my music, because at this point, I feel like it's not even about me anymore. No matter what topic I'm touching on, I feel like I'm doing it for everyone my age or whatever age they are who feels they want to succeed. I want to show everyone that no matter what the odds are you can succeed if you're determined, & ultimately, I believe & know in my heart there are a lot of people I'll be able to reach out to with my music, so I'd appreciate it if you all could just support me by recommending the music to people you know because I've been here long enough to where I can say this is a family community that I feel like I'm apart of, so that's why I want support from you all.

[Voorheeszilla]

Newest song:

For My Town

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yerR2s4XNyQ

[Voorheeszilla]

No Love

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pumKXY1c-O8

I think this is our best song yet. Lyrics, delivery, all that shit. Fucking love it.

[Voorheeszilla]

Edit: Removed song (copyright reasons, very long story)

[Voorheeszilla]

Here We Go (Remix)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SoBt88Alyk

[Voorheeszilla]

Alright, haven't posted in this thread in a while, but throughout October I was incredibly busy, & mostly with promoting music. I took our version of "No Love" from 268 views to 1,065 in just a one month span, & I'm very proud of that, especially since about 90% of the feedback we've gotten has been very, very inspirational & encouraging. I also finally managed to put together some new songs, so here they are:

First 2 Bomb:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXo0srWRQdM

Thug N**** Swag:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OolipNZKZbE

I Don't Like The Look Of It:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmAFBP2m8Rs

I'm also sitting on the remix of "Gansta" which I'll be uploading hopefully later in the week, & I also plan to drop some more songs this week. If you listen to the last two songs, I've actually really gotten into the style of a more fast paced rapping, & I flow a lot better than before.

My goal is to drop at least 15 more songs before this year is over, but that all really depends on how well the promoting goes. If it continues to go as well as it did for October, I'll definitely drop that number of songs. I've basically spent the last two months getting songs the number of views I know they deserve, & I'm incredibly excited about where everything's headed.

It's really amazing to even think people are loving my music & wanting more. It's a great feeling to have. But, all in all, it's looking to be a very busy last two months for this year, & I have to make sure I accomplish everything I'm setting out to do, because I plan on dropping a lot of songs next year.

I'm thinking it'll be at least 100 or more next year. Right now I'm building the audience so that when I get to that stage people will automatically be aware of the songs & so far, it's going a lot better than expected.

[Voorheeszilla]

Still Ballin'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IUgibmBx4go

I Get Crazy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTHD_r0SDY0

For a little while I had kind of lost any inspiration to do more tracks & I have no clue why, but after I did First 2 Bomb I've just felt like doing more & more songs. I literally wrote & dropped I Get Crazy in the span of half an hour. It wasn't planned, I just thought about the beat for some reason, pulled it up, & took it from there.

[Voorheeszilla]

J Lethal & Taevon Shevy - Where The Cash At

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3xu2ALjGHY

Taevon Shevy & J Lethal - I'm Paid

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4dbcuWjjy7A

I really love both songs, & the instrumentals for both are just insane. I really do give a lot of credit to Taevon for making them.

[Voorheeszilla]

Lethal's Revenge (Roman's Revenge Remix)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuV_Qi40m40

Make It Rain

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U9q2i-Xv4Y0

Drop The World

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TgaeBNxowAQ

Fire Flame

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iyMooXLSqJA

Got a lot more tracks coming, but they'll be mostly original ones with beats made by Taevon instead of mixtape tracks. Out of this bunch, though, I'd say Lethal's Revenge is the best, & funny enough, it's gotten the best reaction out of them all.

[Jus-X]

Zilla man... dude I gotta be honest, I'm not a big rap fan, so maybe I'm not the right person to listen to when it comes to critiques, but dude, I couldn't listen to the third or forth video simply because I think Lethal's Revenge and Make It Rain seem like you're trying to say and rhyme as many words as you can as quickly as your voice will let you, and it just doesn't sound good. I can't hear structure of choruses and brides and verses... but maybe that's supposed to be the popular style?

Don't take it personally, but it's the reason why I don't like alot of death metal either. I don't mind the screaming, the growling, the pounding symbols, but when they jack the tempo up to a billion beats a second and scream 1003 words into 30 seconds, I just don't like it.

I like a little rap and hip hop, but what I like is artists who take their time, putting their pain and anger into the words and letting us hear it. When an artist makes music just to create a sound and make it good, then IMO it's ok at best. But when as artist makes music so somebody else can feel what they feel, then that's great.

My opinion, but the sound is not my fancy.

[Voorheeszilla]

Well, the whole purpose of fast paced rapping is to rap as much as you can, but I've learned to not force words in where they won't fit, so I flow a lot better with fast rapping than I used to, & I'm still learning as I go along. I haven't perfected it yet like Busta Rhymes or Eminem. Keep in mind I've only been rapping for about eight months, & I've been using the fast paced rapping style even less.

Get At Me Now (Look At Me Now Remix):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSjqhQ0f-Uo

The first time I heard the original version of this song was on Saturday, & then I decided to remix it the next day. I was very inspired by Busta & Weezy because the shit they were spitting was hot.

[Voorheeszilla]

Edit

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